Sunday, December 29, 2013

Saturn Return

I am in the midst of my second Saturn return, conjunct on Christmas Eve. Nothing earth shattering, thank goodness... I have been enjoying a well earned and much longed for time away from the routine of office work. I am deeply rested and more relaxed than I have been in ~ well.. it was when I met my mom at the beach; I guess that must have been a couple years ago. Too long really.

I have been at my easel every day, very close to completing my new piece "Calling In the Spirits." Depicting a shamanic practitioner, mysticism, the unseen world. It is on a 24" x 24" canvas, acrylic paint, drew out the main figure and the rest was painted in intuitively ~ a great deal of my work is created like that; a central idea and then let my soul take over the brush. The scene depicts ordinary and non ordinary reality. Spirit is in blue, purple and pink; and ordinary reality is in green. Today I put my brush down, and I will sit on it for a day or so. Stepping back, I let the scene play in my mind, I see things then, that need to be corrected for color or line. It makes me happy.

A path in the woods, deep green mossy woods like you find in the Olympic mountains, call to me and ask me to take a walk. I have stopped at a divergence, and contemplate which path to take ~ the path less taken or the path which offers routine and safety. I have been here so long that I have set up a campsite, whilst trying to come to a decision. I know what my heart hungers for and yet remain because of uncompleted obligations.

And so it is... this cold winter day, deep in my Saturnian contemplation of: 
taking back the innocence and wonder which was lost in childhood. How to reclaim the sensual maiden which was shamed and stored away in a locked treasure chest. The mother letting go of her child as he begins to walk his own path.  I listen now to the crone's voice and cast my bones, the Baba Yaga advises me to fight the monsters which would rule me. No this is not a scene for the fair of heart who would faint and weep, cowering in fear of retribution from other. This requires the strength that all women have within them, to stand tall in their courage, to take solace in their strength of will, to know the blessing which is found in their cradle of life.  And so it is...  

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

shadow cosmology

Tonight the moon is new
and sheds no light upon my walk.
Yet, the stars glitter coldly
in the purple night sky and winters
chill seeps into my bones.

My secret garden is filled with
shadows but I fear them not
as I behold you there in the glen
where the shadows are deepest
and ice crystals coat the
remnants of summer green.

Seated upon your mossy throne
splendidly alluring; I crawl
onto your lap and curl into
your welcoming arms.
Cernunnos, cradle me close
whisper your lovers devotion,
to my solitary heart.

You are my shadow cosmology,
an archetypal lover.
You speak to me of soul and
the road less taken.
It is the ancient bloodlines which
call to me and guide me
on this moonless night.